Who You Loving Valentine's Day and Beyond?

So many put a ton of effort into getting the right gift, the right card, going to the right dinner and setting the right mood, but don't know if it's with the right person!

Valentine's Day is a day built on love. For those who know they have found THE ONE and are nestled in the right relationship, there should be a monthly Valentine's Day. Those who are still speculating on him or her, need to understand that no amount of 'right' or perfect gift on one day will make a future with someone correct.

I spoke with a guy who just proposed to his long-time mate. He did everything a woman would want for her engagement; a two carat ring, special pomp and circumstance within a posh restaurant filled with lots of strangers surrounding them, so they could ogle at her gorgeous ring.  Even with all that, he stated he's not sure if he did the right thing with the right woman. WHAT? He succumbed to the pressure of her and her mother, only to now have ex's and 'friends' telling him he shouldn't have; he's second guessing his decision to propose. So, now he is in a precarious situation;  continue the farce or be honest and admit to her that he's not ready to marry and he's unsure about his future with her. 

Why even put yourself in that situation?  We can love a multitude of people for various reasons.  The one you request to spend the rest of your life with, however, you should love beyond measure.  It's not the value in a day {In this instance Valentine's Day} or the influences of persons around you, that makes for the proper timing when it comes to choosing your life mate. 

Treat every day as your opportunity to find out if the person you are with is truly THE ONE.  Peer and parental pressures aside, stand strong in your beliefs and your cautiousness.  After all, you are taking your time for some reason.  If you have done the homework and decide the person is right for you, but your friends don't see it the same way, then maybe it's your friendship that needs reevaluating!

Find the one who is the right fit.  No one else should have to tell you or push you to that realization.

Leaves, Branches and Trees

Have you seen the stage play "Madea Goes to Jail?" Well, Ma-to-the-D-E-A drops knowledgeable messages in every play!

One such message was: (I'm paraphrasing and putting my own spin on it)...

People are either leaves, branches or trees in our lives.

If a person is a leaf, they will blow away at the first sign of trouble. They are not strong people. Their place in your life should be minimal, because they will only be with and/or for you when times are good. The minute things get bad, they are out!

Then there are the branch people. These people are a little better than the leaves. They are a little stronger but can't really take the weight a true friendship holds; they break when things get too heavy for them to bare. When the branches break, you are left to fall flat on your back. A branch won't even have the stamina to reach down to pick you up. Branches want to support you but are good for your light-weight issues only!

Lastly, the tree people are the best and long lasting of them all. These people have roots firmly planted in your life. No matter the storm, they will stand firm. Tree people are grounded and not worried about how many leaves that blow off or branches that break. Tree people remain sturdy and prepared to help you with whatever life threw at you. These are the people you should try surround yourself with always!

Now, that little analogy should teach us something. We have different types of people in our lives, however, we need to make sure they are all in their proper categories. You don't want to give a leaf a tree's issues. It won't even be around to help you deal. You don't want to hold something back from the tree and give it to the branch. Before you know it, that person has broken down and can't be of any assistance to you.

The weak ones (leaves) need love as well, but make sure you don't put too much stock in that type of person/friend. The leaves are gone before you know it; they lack permanency. The moderate ones (branches) are so-so in the quality of friendship they will give and/or provide to you. Most often they are okay with your positive issues but when the weight of the negative issues hit, they are out. The strong ones (trees) have built their lives on a solid foundation. They are stable and understand nothing in life is perfect. When the storms of life roll in, you can stand behind them and feel comforted by the strength exhibited to help you wade out the storm(s).

I'm a firm believer that people come into our lives for a reason, season or lifetime. People are also broken down as a leaf, branch or tree in your life. Deposit those around you into the perfect category.

Classification works in every aspect of your life. We don't often put people in specific areas/places in our life, but we should.

The realities are: Everyone is not your "friend." Everyone doesn't have your best interests at heart. Everyone doesn't want you happy or to see any form of happiness around you. Everyone can't help you through everything life throws at you. We can't pick our battles, trials and tribulations, but we can pick the portion of a tree we choose to help us along.

(Picture courtesy of Google images)