I believe we do not listen to what the other person is saying. Most times we refuse to listen intently to what a person is telling us. Afterwards, we blame the other person for not being straightforward or for not stating things plainly. However, if we listened properly the first time, we would hear exactly what the person was saying (or not) and we would not hear what we want them to say.
He said.......I'm dating.
She said.....But, I'm so into you.
Stop wanting something that isn't there. He said he's dating which means he's not trying to settle down just yet. You cannot make anyone do something they just don't want to. Instead, understand the person is trying to do them for a time. If you interfere, you will bring about more hurt for yourself.
She said....I'm in a relationship.
He said....Are you happy?
WHAT? Okay, if a person is in a relationship, he or she is most likely a little happy or they wouldn't be in that situation. Instead of trying to make something out of nothing or offering "can I be your friend?," realize that we must learn to respect one another more when he or she says they are involved. Respect that person's union regardless of whether they are happy or not.
He said....I want to take things slow.
She said...Why? I don't understand.
Maybe some people need a brick dropped on them to recognize when a person isn't really feeling them. When a man or woman is into you, they will do whatever they can to be with you. If they are "taking it slow," that should be an indication that they are checking you out for one reason or another; good or bad. Instead of allowing yourself to be shelved, realize there are other opportunities (men or women) out there.
She said...It's a little complicated.
He said...Well, I'm still trying to be there, if you'll have me.
Realize that "complicated" is another word for the person having issues that may not be something you would want to deal with. People often think they have an "all-healing" presence and can usher people from an unclear situation into their light. It's just not that easy. I applaud those who can say "I'm going through a little something and need some time," instead of those who continually play with the emotions of others. In return, the other person should be conscious of a person's situation and leave them to work the situation out.
Life is complicated enough. We ingest a lot of information. Some of that information isn't really clear, but most is. The key problem is we don't want a person to say a particular thing. We would rather hear what we would like to hear. In the end, however, they reiterate what they have said all along and we are left contemplating why we had not opened our ears initially.
A lot of relationships begin and end with communication. Communication requires a sender, a receiver and feedback. If you're in the sender or receiver position and are unsure of what a person is saying, use the feedback in order to clarify things. Don't assume. We all know how that works out in the end. Never take anything for granted. The worse question to have is the one unasked. Be also prepared for the answer. Most of us will ask a question, but when the answer comes, we refute it; we are unprepared for the answer because it's the unpolluted truth.
Listen more. Decipher and analyze less. Understand what you're hearing is what the person is saying. If you hear something that seems convoluted, then it just may be. If what you hear is something you believe you are not prepared to deal with, then walk away. Don't remain in something simply because you believe you can sway a person to share your beliefs. In the end, it won't work.
He said.......I'm dating.
She said.....But, I'm so into you.
Stop wanting something that isn't there. He said he's dating which means he's not trying to settle down just yet. You cannot make anyone do something they just don't want to. Instead, understand the person is trying to do them for a time. If you interfere, you will bring about more hurt for yourself.
She said....I'm in a relationship.
He said....Are you happy?
WHAT? Okay, if a person is in a relationship, he or she is most likely a little happy or they wouldn't be in that situation. Instead of trying to make something out of nothing or offering "can I be your friend?," realize that we must learn to respect one another more when he or she says they are involved. Respect that person's union regardless of whether they are happy or not.
He said....I want to take things slow.
She said...Why? I don't understand.
Maybe some people need a brick dropped on them to recognize when a person isn't really feeling them. When a man or woman is into you, they will do whatever they can to be with you. If they are "taking it slow," that should be an indication that they are checking you out for one reason or another; good or bad. Instead of allowing yourself to be shelved, realize there are other opportunities (men or women) out there.
She said...It's a little complicated.
He said...Well, I'm still trying to be there, if you'll have me.
Realize that "complicated" is another word for the person having issues that may not be something you would want to deal with. People often think they have an "all-healing" presence and can usher people from an unclear situation into their light. It's just not that easy. I applaud those who can say "I'm going through a little something and need some time," instead of those who continually play with the emotions of others. In return, the other person should be conscious of a person's situation and leave them to work the situation out.
Life is complicated enough. We ingest a lot of information. Some of that information isn't really clear, but most is. The key problem is we don't want a person to say a particular thing. We would rather hear what we would like to hear. In the end, however, they reiterate what they have said all along and we are left contemplating why we had not opened our ears initially.
A lot of relationships begin and end with communication. Communication requires a sender, a receiver and feedback. If you're in the sender or receiver position and are unsure of what a person is saying, use the feedback in order to clarify things. Don't assume. We all know how that works out in the end. Never take anything for granted. The worse question to have is the one unasked. Be also prepared for the answer. Most of us will ask a question, but when the answer comes, we refute it; we are unprepared for the answer because it's the unpolluted truth.
Listen more. Decipher and analyze less. Understand what you're hearing is what the person is saying. If you hear something that seems convoluted, then it just may be. If what you hear is something you believe you are not prepared to deal with, then walk away. Don't remain in something simply because you believe you can sway a person to share your beliefs. In the end, it won't work.
(Photo courtesy of Google images)
No comments:
Post a Comment
Thanks so much for leaving a message. I hope you were blessed by what you read. Have a great day!